Do you like your porgs pan-fried, deep-fried, stir-fried, or straight up with feathers?
Ever since they were unleashed on an unsuspecting world last month, in a behind-the-scenes video from The Last Jedi, we’ve assumed that porgs are the new trilogy’s cutesy marketing gimmick Ewoks with feathers and bigger eyes.
The bird-like creatures are said to be numerous on the islands of Ahch-to, the world where Rey, BB-8, and Chewbacca find Luke Skywalker. They were created by director Rian Johnson, who noted that the real-life Irish island on which they were filming was filled with puffins.
But fans couldn’t help but notice one shot of Chewbacca in the Millennium Falcon with what appears to be a feather sticking out of his mouth.
That could have been dismissed as a crew prank, were it not for the fact that the porgs-as-Wookiee-food theory made its way into Entertainment Weekly‘s information-rich cover story on The Last Jedi.
The story reveals that Chewbacca is still mourning the loss of buddy-for-life Han Solo and is “a little more volatile than usual.”
Volatile, and perhaps a little hungry. After all, even a 7-foot-tall walking carpet’s gotta eat. And what else is there to eat when you’re in Ahch-to?
All signs point to Luke refusing Rey entry to his hovel in the movie, nixing the notion that he might offer his old Wookiee pal a bowl of Yoda-style soup.
So does Chewie chow down on porgs? All we have to go on are a couple of pictures, including Chewie volatile, depressed, hungry Chewie sitting by a campfire.
Hungry. Angry. Lonely. Tired. The combination of elements that might make a Wookiee even a rational, fiercely loyal, spaceship-fixing companion like Chewie devour even the cutest and most forbidden of snacks.
There’s also a picture of a porg in the Millennium Falcon cockpit next to Chewie, the same spot where a porg isn’t in that picture of the Wookiee with a feather in his mouth. Draw your own conclusions.
Worth noting: In our world, puffin meat is a delicacy in Iceland, where they are as numerous as porgs on Ahch-To. Porgs wouldn’t be hard to catch, either, rather like Dodos.
“Given how rarely their island has visitors,” said Lucasfilm Story Group’s Pablo Hidalgo in a StarWars.com interview, “their curiosity outweighs any skittishness they may have.”
The notion of porgs as food rather than friends or perhaps a mix of both is already disturbing the fine folks of Star Wars Twitter.
If Chewie does get chewy with it, this would not be the first example of one creature eating another in the Star Wars universe.
While English-speaking characters have only been seen to consume soup (Yoda and Luke), protein bars (Yoda and Artoo fight over Luke’s supply), pears (Anakin and Padme), and blue milk (Luke, Uncle Owen, Aunt Beru), we’ve also seen plenty of carnivorous activity among aliens.
Jabba the Hutt ate live food, Jabba’s Rancor monster in Return of the Jedi ate dancing girls, the Sarlacc digested humans over a thousand years, and did you think that Wampa on Hoth in Empire Strikes Back was hanging Luke upside-down in his ice cave for decorative purposes?
Star Wars’ aliens are red in tooth and claw the supposedly cutesy Ewoks most of all. Don’t forget they tried to barbecue our heroes when first we met them, then hammered on empty Stormtrooper helmets, presumably after some kind of great feast at the end of the original trilogy. Hmmm.
And take a closer look at those porgs. Look at their mouths. Notice the sharp teeth, which don’t occur in nature when you’re just eating plants. Could these doe-eyed creatures be carnivorous maybe even cannibalistic themselves?
If so, perhaps Chewie is doing the rest of the Falcon crew a favor.