Sorry to ruin your lives, but Crayola is acting ~cray~ and we really need to address it.
Last week, the beloved art supply company that fueled all of your childhood creativity announced it would be doing something huge on March 31 (a.k.a. National Crayon Day).
Handing out free art supplies? Organizing the world’s largest craft mob? NOPE. For the first time in over one hundred years, Crayola decided it’s time to retire a color from its classic, iconic 24-count box of crayons.
The company casually announced its ruthless decision on its social media platforms as though it wouldn’t crush anyone who has ever colored outside the lines or dared to dream. My gosh. Then, Crayola had the audacity to announce it would be live-streaming the madness and holding an event in New York’s Times Square to really celebrate this tragedy.
If you’re wondering whether the company will be welcoming a new color to the 24-pack or we’ll have to adjust to life with 23 crayons, Joshua Kroo, Director of Marketing Communications & Virtual Creativity Platform, assured Mashable that the 24-count box is safe. So at least we still have that.
“The color will be retired across the entire crayon portfolio including the iconic 24 and 64 count boxes as well as all other Crayon products,” he said. “Crayola is all about innovating with color so consumers can expect that there will be a new, exciting color coming soon!Of course, the 24 box will always have that number of crayons.”
Everything wrong with this heartless decision:
The general timing of this ordeal: Do we really need this added drama in our lives right now, Crayola? No. And you choose to celebrate NATIONAL CRAYON DAY, of all days, by killing a classic crayon off? How do you plan to sleep at night?
You’re pitting us against one another: Aside from harsh social media hashtags associated with this event such as #WhosLeaving and #ShareYourFave, Crayola is also encouraging crayon lovers everywhere to fight for their most beloved colors to stick around, promoting favoritism and resulting in a bunch of sad crayon posts.
This brutal, gut-wrenching COUNT DOWN on Crayola’s website, which shows the company is clearly a monster disguised as a fun-promoting, childhood-loving farce for all these years.
Coloring book of the dead
So the 24-count box currently includes the following crayon colors: red, yellow, blue, brown, orange, green, violet, black, carnation pink, yellow orange, blue green, red violet, red orange, yellow green, blue violet, white, violet red, dandelion, cerulean, apricot, scarlet, green yellow, indigo and gray.
It seems like the primary and secondary colors would remain, along with everyone’s go-tos, black and brown. But who even knows anymore??
“We know from polls across America that blue is the most popular color, but of course, everyone has their favorite Crayola color!” Kroo said.
This means color combos and variations of classics might have reason to worry. But if we were the notoriously useless white crayon, we’d be sweating our wrappers off right now.
Whatever happens, we’ll always remember our classic 24-pack.